Oh no no no, I meant everyone EXCEPT you.

Permit me a moment to vent if you would. Currently at work the Recreational Committee, of which I am a card carrying member, is in the early stages of Holiday party planning.  As a part of the initial stages I sent out a mass e-mail yesterday for the purposes of polling the office on how they would prefer to celebrate.  This e-mail included several gently worded but explicit instructions that I foolishly believed would be simple to follow.

Jesus Wept!

I had no idea how many people believe that they alone are the exception to the rule. 

When I said "Please do not hit 'reply to all' as the 54 people who received this e-mail do not care where you would prefer to eat", I did not mean "Please do not hit 'reply to all' unless you are Sal, the super awesomest person alive because EVERYBODY wants to know where Sal wants to eat.

Additionally, when I said "Please select only one of the following options." I did not mean "unless you are Andrea who should feel free to rank all of the options in her order of preference so that we can all be sure to vote accordingly".

Finally, when I ended the e-mail with the statement "The results will be announced Friday morning." This was not a free invitation for every one of you assholes to walk down to my office every five minutes to ask me how the results are looking. IF YOU ARE NOT ON THE REC COMMITTEE IT IS NONE OF YOUR FREAKING CONCERN! Unless of course you plan on offering me cash or other valuables in an effort to sway the votes in your direction. 

That being said, I do not accept credit cards or personal checks, but money orders are acceptable, and, as always, my best friends call me Cash.