B is for Butt

I've been eating too much crap.  This bear has my butt.

A new lust!

It's been several years since my last visit to a retirement community or a moth-ball laden cedar chest.  That being said, it's not surprising that I completely forgot about the existence of beautiful needleworked purses and bags.  Thanks once again to etsy, I have rediscovered a lost love.  Scope some of these lovelies for both inspiration, and Christmas gift ideas (for me).

This one would be lovely in Spring time.

This one too!

Perfect  for Autumn, or for any time you are feeling super mod.

So pretty for a little girl!

Chunky and very pretty.

This one is my favorite favorite.  It's so pretty it makes me want to puke.

Aren't they too too loverly?  It's almost retarded how awesome they are. Sigh. I wonder, if I were to carry one, would I be overwhelmingly tempted to keep ribbon candies and starlight mints in it? Would I begin tipping with quarters and wearing knee garters?  Who knows?  Sure would be funny though.

Yeowch!

Went to the dentist to have my teeth cleaned today.  The hygienist assured me that they were lovely and healthy.  THEN WHY DO THEY HURT SO BAD? I suppose it was the flossing.  My gums just aren't used to that, they feel like a giant bruise.  I want to rip all of my teeth out with my bare hands.

Which reminds me.  I watched this movie on Netflix the other day:

It's a horror movie about a girl with vagina dentata.  I am sure you can pretty much guess where that goes.



The beach is ours again!

Well, it's Neptune Festival time again.  That's right, every September my town hosts a grand event in celebration of the mass exodus of tourists who have been littering our beaches all summer.  Now, don't get me wrong, I understand that tourism is a major part of the local economy, but it does become quite frustrating to lose your town for 3 to 4 months every year to people who have filled their bags with swim trunks and flip flops, but somehow forgot to pack their common courtesy.  If I had a nickel for every time I almost got hit by an oversized SUV with New York tags while trying to cross the street in the summer, I'd have like... five bucks.  Which is a lot when you consider each nickel to be a brush with death.  Regardless, of how I feel about it, I can't be alone, because this whole town has a big party for three days once the season ends.  There's a marathon, a parade, tons of bands and outdoor concerts, food stands, and art show and about a billion other activities for us locals to enjoy.  Aside from the funnel cakes, my favorite part of the Neptune Festival is the "North American Sandsculpting Championship".  It's kind of a big deal.  People come from all over the world to showcase their sandsculpting abilities.  Seriously, like Russia, the Netherlands, Finland, France...pretty much all over.  My fact checker is currently on vacation, but I am 99% sure that this is the largest sandsculpting competition in the world.  I'm not making this stuff up.  It's real, and it's pretty awesome.  I mean, you don't see stuff like this very often.

That is all made out of sand.  SAND PEOPLE!  Look at the details, the lacework, it's incredible!

There is no adhesive, no skeleton or internal structure, just pure, unadulterrated sand.  It's pretty awesome really.  I'm almost sorry the tourists have to miss it.

Not really though.